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| : : and so, it's official.. : : |
| 01.22.05 (6:53 am) [edit] |
these are the 8 choices that i've just applied for my degree:
1. screen arts at uitm, shah alam
2. advertising at uitm, shah alam
3. broadcasting at uitm, shah alam
4. publishing at uitm, shah alam
5. communication at upm, serdang
6. media communication at ukm, bangi
7. communication at usm, penang
8. communication at uum, kedah
ahh~ i am so lega. i've been having stomachache the whole day and the moment i filled out the form, i went melabur straight away. hah.
i love studying the thing that i'm studying. kalau ikutkan hati, aku nak belajar je sampai ke tua. tak payah sibuk-sibuk nak keje. but of course, who's gonna pay for that. umi really wanted me to do mass com. in australia, especially. she said mass com is more established and is a safer choice. she worried so much about me not having a job after graduating. she said, "if that happens, i can't help u like i helped your brother. i know nobody in your area. nowadays, everybody goes to university. people like you are everywhere. it's going to be tough."
she's right. but i want to stand on my own two feet. i'll take the risks. back then when i was applying for my diploma, i could have used ayah to study anywhere i want, but i didn't. i love screen arts. that is where my passion and my dreams are. i've pushed myself for 3 years. i want to do clips for fresh talents. i want to do commercials that are close to the society. i want to tell stories from my point of view through my films. about that paranoia.. insyaAllah oneday i'll get a nice job. aku dah ada banyak contact dekat sini, sayanglah nak tinggalkan. i just gotta put some sweat.
i want to spend my life doing this. i don't intend to make a revolution in the industry or open anybody's eyes. i just want to add some flavour because i think that is what we are lack of. to me, high quality or low quality is not a question anymore. no matter how hard u try, people will talk anyway. and no matter how good your work is, people will still find something not good about it. then you'll realize that no way u can be perfect. and suddenly being imperfect is such a crime. that's how it is in any industry. a single flaw, and you're out.
let me quote this from a senior of mine: "musicians have better attitude compared to filmmakers. they are much more supportive. musicians respect their newcomers. they don't laugh. they teach. filmmakers however, only criticize. they are pushy and they are always finding faults."
i agreed.
now back to the flavour thing. think about breadspread. peanut butter, honey, margarine, kaya, pandan kaya, coconut kaya, jam, raspberry jam, strawberry jam.. and if u want to get creative, u can put sardine, tuna, cheese, baked beans, scrambled egg, chicken curry, that susu cap teko inside of your fridge.. anything! what i'm trying to say here is, we need more flavour. if hollywood has 1001 flavours, our local industry probably has 10. romance, comedy, romance, comedy, cinta tiga segi, cinta empat segi, yadi yadi yada.
a tribute to aziz m. osman for being variety in creativity. and yasmin ahmad for the guts. currently, my favourite local films are buli, trauma and gangster. no kidding! (and boy, i really wanna watch sepet. isk. no chance.) u guys should watch 'em. and watch positively.
i miss nazila and ezry. dearly.
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| : : i told u. i hate making decisions. : : |
| 01.20.05 (9:51 am) [edit] |
i'm in the middle of what i call it as a 'degree dilemma'..
private college? um? usm? ukm? or just continue at uitm?
screen or mass com. screen or mass com.
what i want. what they want. what i REALLY want.
what's the best for my future?
will i get a good, satisfying job?
one of my BIGGEST fears in life is making the wrong choice and regret later. REGRET. man, i hate that word.
screen or mass com. screen or mass com.
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| : : some very nice pics : : |
| 01.05.05 (4:00 am) [edit] |
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it's the tsunami season and here's just a few pictures to remind myself how beautiful life is and how i should never stop feeling grateful...
raya open house at my cousin's.
me trying to explain my salasilah keluarga to ezry while haniza's looking at the family picture and nazila eyeing on other foods to attack.
haniza: nok, meh la ambik gambar dengan akak...
aida: since when u takut dengan camera flash ni nazila?
wani comel: alah.. dia tak nak ambik gambar, sudah! biar kita je posing!
ezry: hek eleh! ambik gambar pun kecoh ke??
nazila: eh eh korang ni.. penah tengok orang mati makan penampar tak?
we took about 8 hours and 37 minutes just to persuade nazila to join us for a single darn picture. yeah. she's a little bit of a photo-phobic.
at last a picture after lotsa spaghetti and laksa johor (not forgetting that killer sambal belacan!). that's haniza, aida, me, ezry, and nazila (she said closing her eyes will help.) oh well.. happy new year now.
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